ktleeper

This is about emotions and shit so if you don't care, don't bother reading past this sentence.
Well.. about a week ago the my one and a half year long relationship came to an end, and I'm still not sure what to do. I've told all my friends I want to be alone for the summer, which I guess is true. I don't know.. I knew it would never work out between me and her, we're too different, but for a while there I convinced myself it might. She was all wrong for me, but because I was right for her I thought maybe. But I was right before, we never really had a chance. I don't know whether to regret the time I had with her, or to be happy it happened. I more regret all the things I never got to do with her. I only got to take her on a few dates. A year and a half and only about 5 dates that whole time.. I was kind of a shitty boyfriend. But she won't say it, or even believe it. I know it's for the best. That I'll get over her soon enough, and she won't be the only thing on my mind by the summer's end most likely. But even so, there's part of me that wants to beg her for us to get back together. And all of me wants to talk to her, but I can't. She needs space. We're not exactly friends at the moment, we haven't said a word to each other since. That's probably normal though huh?
Anyway, I guess I just feel very empty at the moment. Kinda hate myself but I'll get used to that too probably..
Sorry I posted this, but if you took the time to read the whole thing thanks.

tagged by vulques

"You can tell a lot about someone by the music they listen to."
Hit shuffle on your iPod/ Phone/ iTunes/ media player and write down the first five songs that play, then pass this on to 5 people."

1) A Man Needs a Maid - Niel Young
2) So High So Low - Ben Harper
3) Gold To Me - Ben Harper
4) Jonah - Sister Rosetta Tharpe
5) Revolution - The Beatles
... So that's not much of my music taste except for Revolution but whatever XD My father put all of his music onto my Zune soo...
Anyways! I tag
xXDeathVineXx leftunsolved Xion-Solitude YukiStorm1225 Rayne-Falls712 BleedingHearts98 

So... I just came out as trans to my dad.
He reacted really well. I still haven't told him that I've already decided to go by Kyle, and use male pronouns because he said he doesn't want me to make any decisions too quickly because this is a confusing thing and we should work through it together. So it still stands that you shouldn't call me Kyle Todd when family's around. But, he reassured me that all he wants is for me to be as comfortable as I can be, and that he loves me. Also he's glad I told him, so that made me very confident in my decision.
All and all this went extremely well.. I'm still in the dazed mode, but I'm sure I'll be very happy soon.
Thanks everyone for all your support. Really, it means a ton.

Hey everyone... So, I've done some research on the topic, and as many of you have probably guessed, I'm transgender and/or gender queer. I've been trying to figure out what exactly I should do, because there were things that I would have preferred, but I was afraid to ask people to do, cause I didn't know what they'd think, or even if they'd be able to. But, after thinking about it for a while now, I've decided that I should take this step, because I think it will be better for me in the long run. So, I know it won't be easy, but I was wondering if all of you could at least TRY to call me Kyle Todd (or Kyle, or Todd), and use male pronouns when referring to me... If you slip up that's fine, I get it, but it would mean a lot to me if you at least tried...
So yeah... If you could do that, it'd be great.. Thanks.

I can't blame you for thinking that I'm just being stupid when I complain about my problems. If you were to compare our lives, there would be no competition with who's life is worse. You've been through a lot, and are still going through a ton, and I'm sorry for that. You've got to believe that if I could take the pain your in and suffer for you I would, in an instant. You mean more than the world to me, and it hurts to see you like this. I love you so very much, and I have never understood why you find that so hard to believe. When I see you I don't see the wounds you've harbored, I see the person you are now because of them. And no matter how many scars you've sustained, no matter how many breakdowns you've suffered, I will continue to see you as beautiful, and I will continue to see you as lovable. And if when you're scared and hurting I can't be there for you then I'm sorry. I wish I could be there every time you needed a friend, every time you just wanted someone to talk to. I wish I could, but I can't. I'll do my best, despite the barriers, and I know that sometimes that's not enough, but I will keep trying. Anyways, this is all just to say that I don't care what you're going through or what you've done, I love you just the same, and I want to be there for you in any way I can. You are wonderful to me, and I'm glad to be able to call you a friend.



This may seem kind of random, but I have a lot of friends who are going through some rough stuff right now... This is to all of them, even though only one may see it. Also, this isn't romantic, it may sound like it, but it's not.
(And sorry I'm so awful with words, I tried)